Family and Kinship

My interviewee is named Sandra, She is my mother. She is a grandparent and a great-grandparent. I should mention that my Mom is 78 years old. The year she lived in Kittredge was in the 30’s, 40s and early 50s. She was born in Kittredge Colorado. Kittredge is a small mountain town, where everybody knows everyone.  The main form of entertainment is horseback riding, rodeos and fishing. The cultural is like small town USA. Most of the men had jobs outside of the home and the women stayed home and took care of the children. The town is mostly white, German descent. Socialization took place all the time. Neighbors would drop in during the day and in general people helped each other.

2. I interviewed my Mom at my kitchen table over a cup of coffee. I was relaxed and happy most of the time. Sometimes, I was sad, especially hearing about a cousin that had passed on, or family trials that happened.  I did not feel awkward during the interview at all. I talk with my Mom all the time. I think that if I interviewed someone unrelated to me it could be awkward. Family is always a sensitive subject. It seems personal details always come out, divorces etc. that can bring up painful memories.

3. I realized that our kinship bonds are maintained by the women, especially the Grandmothers. We use the bilateral system of descent to identify our kindred. Most of the holidays were spent at the grandmother’s houses. The Grandmothers often raised the grandchildren at one time or another. One of the patterns I identified is that all the women are alloparents to the children. My mom stated that I have now taken over the role of the Grandmother. She is too old to cook and raise kids, so the family holidays now take place at my house, with all the nieces and nephews attending. Mom sits at the kitchen table and each person that enters the house will sit with her and talk to her until the next person comes in. This goes for friends as well as family members. It is a sign of respect as the eldest woman in the family. The males in the family are content to let the women arrange the social events and they are more distant in communicating with each other.  The males will help each other out when needed. For instance when someone is moving or needs a major house repair. In times of distress, family members will stay with each other. My Mom’s grandmother always had someone living with her that was not related to her. She would take in people who needed help. This has followed down the generation. We all have at one time or another had person who was not a relative live with us. Mom stated that our family is a multicultural family. My great great aunt was full-blooded Blackfoot Indian. Mom’s other daughter; married a Native American and her children have married Hispanics. My one niece is married to a Russian, and my other niece is married to a Persian. Mom stated that she was always very open to the mixed races in our family. Our family size has progressive grown smaller. My Mom had five kids, three survived. In my generation two children were the most common and the younger generation has one child.

4. I know most of my relatives fairly well on both sides of the family, my father’s side I knew mostly when I was younger. I do not socialize with my cousins. All of my cousins live very far away and are difficult to socialize with. Also my Grandmother was the person who integrated the family and she has passed on. I make most of the family decisions in my family. I have inherited the role of family integrator, so I am the connective link for the older and younger generations. All family members are treated equally once they have become a part of the family. However, it takes a while to become a member of the family. Marriage partners are treated somewhat formally until some time has passed. The women in my family are very assertive and strong. The men of the family seem to complement this strength, so there is not much difference in the respect level in regards to gender. I have learned that the women in the family are the integrators of our family system. This role is generational. Also the women in my family have a strong tradition of helping others in need. This also seems generational.